11 things you only know if you’re addicted to online shopping

25 October 2017
By Fashion Quarterly

10 THINGS YOU ONLY KNOW IF YOU’RE ADDICTED TO ONLINE SHOPPING

Because online shopping is life.

If you despise crowds or prefer to make informed purchase decisions – *ahem* prefer shopping around from the comfort of your living room – then odds are, you’re an avid online shopper.

But it’s not as though you’re addicted right? Online shopping is just a hobby… You fill your cart and wishlists on the reg without actually buying them (most of the time). It’s totally normal. But then again….

Your web history is full of shopping sites


Your web history is full of shopping sites and you’ve got more bookmarks saved than Khloe Kardashian has shoes in her closet.


Online shopping is therapeutic

Because when you online shop, the world gets better. Not even the season two premiere of Riverdale could compete with the dopamine hit that ‘proceed to checkout’ gives you.


You’re always running a full cart


So many deals, so many ah-mazing pieces, OMG want, want, want. Add, add, add. Go on, just save it for later. “I’ll come back for you,” you tell yourself. There’s no harm in moving EVERYTHING to cart… before abruptly exiting your browser, #amiright?


Your notifications centre is always full with alerts

Your phone has ‘Do Not Disturb’ forever enabled to silence the persistent stream of emails and app notifications hitting you up about deals at all hours of the night. But you’d prefer that than to not know, because you always want to see what’s new in this week, who’s going on sale, what you could redeem that 10% off voucher from subscribing on and most importantly, that excuse to online shop! “We miss you, here’s 15% off,” – oh, you do? OK, but only ‘cos you miss me (enters credit card details).


You follow more brands than friends on social media

This one’s pretty self-explanatory. It’s your gateway to trends, new product, and the go-live for a Kylie cosmetics restock intel on who’s wearing what and which blogger you’re going to copy. Not to mention you hear from Onceit more than your own mother.


You stalk items until they go on sale

So you need an absolute overhaul of cool, It-girl items to be feeling totally on point. Your confidence needs this. In that case, you’ll add that baker boy hat to cart, then that hand-painted leather jacket, followed by that Gen-Z yellow puffer jacket and— what’s that bank balance? Insufficient funds, you say? (Promptly moves everything from cart into wishlist).


You have so many clothes, but can never find anything to wear


Even though you’ve got 14 pairs of jeans, seven white shirts, 10 pairs of trainers and eight pairs of black heels, you’re absolutely s**t out of ideas when it comes to choosing what you’re wearing to casual Friday. But hey, no stress because MLM has just dropped a white shirt with a ruffle at the back and you only have one that has ruffles on the sleeves and you’ve already worn that a couple times and all you’re asking for is to feel good in what you wear – you deserve this. TG for next day delivery.


You know your bank card details off by heart

No wallet, no worries. You know your 16-digits, expiry dates, and CVV codes for your credit and debit cards off-by-heart. Ain’t nothing stopping you from proceeding to checkout on that sale, girl.


You stay up all night browsing

You thought you had turned in for the night. Then your phone sounds (maybe it didn’t, but you could have sworn it did) and it’s not long until you’re wide-eyed and wired on your beaming screen. You only  intend to look for a minute, but then out of nowhere 3.5 hours has passed and your browsing session has swiftly rerouted to ‘how to conceal the under-eye dark circles’ you’ve developed. Besides, this isn’t your first late night episode online shopping this week, is it?


 Your local postie knows you by name

You’ve got so many packages blowing up your address that not only does your local postie able to place a face to the name on the parcels, but you’ve actually established a rapport with them. “Busy week Nige?”, “Yeah, it’s been manic eh”, “Awww, I bet. At least you’ve got that Raro trip coming up though?”, “Yeah, can’t wait”, “Okay bye, no doubt I’ll see you tomorrow”, “K, bye!”…  You close the door and convince yourself that there are plenty of other people that shop WAY more than you and that what you just experienced, is totally normal.


You have parcels arrive that you forgot were even coming

We’re going to level with you on this one. This is the surefire sign that points to an online shopping addiction. While every arriving parcel promising you an endorphin hit should be a pleasant surprise, it shouldn’t be an outright surprise in the who-what-where-on-earth-has-this-come-from vicinity. Nevertheless, there are totally worse things you could be doing. But, one thing is for certain… your totes #addicted.

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