If you’re not following Chrissy Teigen on Twitter already, shame on you.

We literally have Twitter for the single reason of keeping up with her hilarious tweets.

Just when we thought it she couldn’t get any funnier Chrissy started responding to some questions we’ve always wanted the answers to. Life. Made.

Check them out…

Do famous people introduce themselves to other famous people they’ve never met? For example, does Oprah say ‘Hi, I’m Oprah’ to Anna Kendrick?

They do. And whomever is the lesser celebrity giggles and goes “oh I know!!” and the other celeb smirks annoyingly.

I always wondered that! What happens if they don’t know who you (general sense) are?

They say a safe “nice to see you” if they sense they might have met you before. Alt: “good to see you again!” (ballsy).

How do you decide who’s lesser?

You just know.

What if it’s not really comparable like a world famous poet meeting a B-list actor. Who’s the bigger celeb there?

That’s a really good question. Perhaps they both wait for the other to introduce themselves until death.

Have you ever been completely flustered to meet someone?

Beyonce. Mariah. [Real Housewives of Orange County star] Vicki Gunvalson.

Do famous people have to play along when their celeb friends are in a publicity stunt relationship? Do they get paid too?

I’ve only known one person to do this and I found out after. I think it happens less than we think?

How many people do you know are part of the illuminati?

Zero. I thought when I married John he would have to tell me.

Do you think celebrity babies know they’re celebrity babies? Like can you imagine being Chrissy Teigen and John Legend’s baby? That’s so fun.

They don’t and they don’t know you’re famous no matter how many times you yell it at them.

Do celebrities ever pair their kids up for future relationships?

For some wild reason, every parent I know (celeb or not) does this. “Can’t wait for ______ to date _______!!!!”

Do some celebrities depend on nannies to take care of their kids?

To help, is a better way to say it. And others, too. I don’t know anyone that doesn’t want to take care of their kids.

Do famous people go out and buy their own toilet paper and Febreeze and stuff, or does someone do it for you?

Amazon Fresh, baby.

What about dinner reservations? Real names?

Stage name. Better table. Sometimes I make a res under John’s name then kick him out of my girls dinner

How do famous people hire their makeup artists?

They have agencies and portfolios but mostly you’re just like “OK please make me look like your other client, J-LO”.

How do celebrities find assistants? Do you put out a craigslist ad or what?

You steal them.

How do famous people know if one of their in-real-life friends liked their Insta pic or not?

Set to “people you follow” notifications only!

Is “my people will call your people” an actual thing?

Yes, we are incapable of handling our own lives and need to be coddled like children.

Do celebs fangirl when other celebrities tweet them or like their stuff on Instagram?

I get nervous when people I respect follow me. I will go on best behaviour for the day then forget/all goes to hell.

What’s the number one perk of being a celebrity?

No waiting.

How many “swag bags” do you actually get from events, and do you use what’s in them?

Don’t look anymore. Gets donated or brought out in drunken girls’ night giveaways. One can only have so much lip balm.

How do celebs get paid? Do record companies / movie companies just give one huge check? Do you get paychecks?

Depends on the exact industry. For books I get paid then cut a massive check after for costs.

How tense does it get at award shows when the host makes an ill-conceived joke about a celeb who’s in the audience?

I dunno I’m drunk.

Is celeb drama staged most of the time?

No. It’s a combo of having more dramatic drama and loving drama.

Do celebrities message/call each other (with jokes, concerns or popcorn) when a Twitter beef is occurring?

Oh yes.

Do celebs have like a group chat and when sh** happens it’s just like “oh mcSH*TTTTT MAN”?

YEP.

Do celebs save good paps photos they found on the internet into their phones?

Guilty. Will show them to hair and makeup people for future looks.

Have you ever felt so damn bomb that you call up the paps and stage a “spontaneous” photo shoot as you walk to Starbucks?

No, you just go to a pap-ridden restaurant like Craig’s or Nice Guy duhhhh!

Favourite untrue rumour about yourself?

Toss up between Thai lady boy and John’s “paid beard”.

 

Thank you for your insight, Chrissy.